Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Tact

Sometimes I wish I had little cards that I could carry around with the definition of the word tact on them. Some people just don't know what it means and I think they could benefit from the knowledge.

**It's kind of funny that I am writing this because I can be the queen of foot in mouth disease, but I have never made the following faux pas**

This has happened to me twice, which is why it bugs me twice as much. The first time a great uncle said it to me at some family get-together. This second time it happened at my aunt's funeral. The offender was someone with whom my family went to church.

Me: It's good to see you. Thanks for coming.

Offender: How are you? Where are you living now?

Me: Acworth, GA. It's near Atlanta.

Offender: Oh. I was in Atlanta once. {Here's where I start to cringe, cause I can really tell what's coming} I was there at a conference.

Me: What kind of conference? {Trying to head off the inevitable, knowing this guy has zero tact}

Offender: Just blah, blah, blah...{Can't remember what he said. I wasn't listening. Here comes the why you gotta tick me off? part} Atlanta's not my cup of tea.

This is what I don't understand. Why would you tell someone who chooses to live in a certain area that you don't like the area in which they have chosen to live? I have the same problem with people who tell me what I order at a restaurant is disgusting. I'm not going to offer you some of my food and I'm not inviting you to visit me, so I don't need to know your opinion about every single detail of my life.

I wanted to say that to him, but it was definitely not the time or place. I just wish he would have realized that.

It'll probably be another 15 years or so before I see the guy again. I will have my comeback ready by then!

4 comments:

justjuls said...

I totally understand this from both sides. Thanks for the reminder to always be gentle. I have to watch myself. Sometimes I have to be very careful to say graciously that West Virginia is my home, and not offend those who live in Texas by listing the things I loathe about it. The truth for me is that it is just not West Virginia - and it never can be.

Nikki said...

I don't understand why anyone would not love living (or visiting) Georgia. It's a wonderful place, isn't it? And we're finally going to have some cold weather this week. Yea!!

Tina said...

Julie -- That's funny! I don't think you have much to worry about. Every Texan I have ever known has been more than vocal about being proud to be from Texas! I'm sure they understand.

I've always wanted to visit Texas. I don't know why. Maybe the mystique of the place. If you were sticking around, I would beg to come crash on your couch. But, hey! I've never been to Harper's Ferry either! :)

Nikki -- Georgia is great, isn't it? Even Atlanta has a unique southern charm! I can't think of any place really that I would just hate to go to. Any place you go would have something about it you could enjoy at least visiting. I'm pretty sure I'd at least have the grace to fake it!

A. said...

Well, I actually love Texas and Georgia. Now, Indiana...well, I'm learning to like it. We just don't know each other well enough yet.

I LOVE driving through Georgia. LOVE IT! Even the trees are graceful and southern.

I used to hate it when we lived in WV and people would ask where we were from. I'd say, "West Virginia." Always, I'd get the response something along the lines of "OH, I have an aunt in West Virgina. Fairfax, I think." GRRRRR! They are TWO DIFFERENT STATES, PEOPLE! West Virginia and Virginia. And seriously, can't they give WV it's own page in the atlas? To be fair I think they finally did but it was a long time coming.

Sorry, not really about tact and totally off topic.

I love Georgia and people should think before they speak. That is all.